Friday, November 22, 2013

More Tailgating Innovation

I forgot that Dan added "Tailgating Innovation" to the categories on the sidebar.  This is our contribution... a nice cozy for our mini keg full of ice for a hot early season game.  You won't need that now in the dead of winter.

Classic Post Tailgate Refuse


This is exactly how the Bears expect you to leave your tailgate spot when you head into the stadium.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Hamming It Up For The Camera

This guy in a Bears hat was mugging for the camera over blaring music.  Love the quote from Ditka on the back of their van.

Bum Stylin' 2013

Way back in the day we did a post about bums that were finishing off beers people were leaving behind at the South Lot.  That is still a valid tactic nowadays as this guy proves.
Mmmmm mmmm nothing like a backwash half filled Miller Light can.

Dressed as a "Beers" Fan

Friday, October 11, 2013

Drunk Bear Fans Web Site Value

From time to time people talk to Dan or I about "monetizing" the most important site on the Internet, Drunk Bear Fans.

Dan and I usually chuckle because 1) it is damn hard to make any money on the internet (there's not too much there for blogs) 2) it is a lot of work to even try and we don't want to pour the time into it (really, it's not like it has a tremendous value to society, but it is funny).

Some dumb site that directs us traffic (which we don't care about) lets you put in your domain name and it estimates its "value" and "daily income potential".  What did they say about Drunk Bear Fans... wait for it...
We were worth $8.95!  and we can make 15 cents / day!
Ha ha... we're rich, baby.


Drunk Giants Fans in Costume


These Giants fans were in costume and I have no idea what they were trying to accomplish but it was very funny.  At least I waited until I got outside of the washroom to take a photo of the guy in purple which they posed for in the night - some other guy was taking a photo of him while he was at a urinal (note - that's not cool).


Hilarious Giants Fan


Sometimes opposing fans come and they are just dicks (see - the Steelers) and sometimes they are hilarious.  The Giants fans mostly fit into that hilarious category, watching the game, saying something funny, and generally taking the abuse that they were being pelted with in stride.

After the Giants scored this guy was cheering a bit and someone behind me said
Damn you and your glorious hair!
And then he let me take this photo of his, indeed, glorious hair.

High Five Guy On the Wagon


The "high five guy" gives high fives to any women coming up and down the stairs on the interminable walk up to the cheap seats.  He is in an orange shirt.  His buddy who is pretty clever often sits on the aisle seat which causes the usually completely intoxicated high five guy to not get thrown out.  I don't know what was going on but he was actually pretty calm maybe he is on the wagon.

Obscure Jersey


Really... you've been clutching that signed Mike Tomczak jersey all those years?  He was near the 1985 Bears and was apparently the last one to play in the NFL in 2000, but that is faint praise.  Let's review his byline as a Bear per Wikipedia since I'm too lazy to look out any further:

He played for the Bears until 1990 starting 31 games and throwing for 31 touchdowns and 47 interceptions.

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Good Bear Costume



This one was a hit.  Seen a lot of these Bear fur wrap arounds but she was rockin' it.

Creative Fake Dog


Love the beads and urinating on the Saints hat.  Someone put a lot of thought into this.

You're Livin' in the Past, Man



Really, how long have you been hanging on to that Mike Brown t shirt.  Yes, he had some amazing years with the Bears but that was a while ago.  I'm sure the threat of knowing that Mike Brown was watching the game on TV somewhere was putting fear in the hearts of our competitors.

The Post That Writes Itself

Some things are just meant to be up on drunk Bear fans.

Monday, September 9, 2013

Literal Drunk "Bear" Fan

Our good friend Fro Dog caught this drunken Bear fan (literally) as they made him throw his beer out leaving the Bears' lot. That looks (a bit) like the awesome Bear costume from the show "Workaholics".


Shotgunners

The guys next to us in the South Lot had a really cool raging party with lots of food, booze, good music and girls.  We got this group shotgun on video for posterity.

Beer Bong

We love beer bongs here at the most important site on the internet, DBF.  While our days of doing them are in the distant past, we can still truly appreciate the skill when one is done properly.

High Five Guy

We love this guy.  He high fives each and every female that walks by and from his condition, we assume that he doesn't remember any of it..  Some return the favor, some don't.  He isn't picky.
As I was typing this up I could have swore that we profiled High Five Guy before and I was right.  Look here for some hilarious video.

Remains of the Day

Lots of people do the old school thing and bring in their own booze, buy a coke, dump out some of the coke and have a mixed drink.  This was an airline bottle of rum.  We see lots of empty flasks in the bathrooms.

Clogged Aisles

When it is hot outside, the beer guys get absolutely mobbed down below so they never make it to the upper levels of the nosebleeds.  Consequently, thirsty patrons make their way down and intercept the beer guys, which in turn clogs the aisles, and makes for a general mess (I had the pleasure of being bathed by the nectar of the gods, Coors Light, when a vendor popped the top on one that had been partially shaken).  Related, when an intoxicated guy behind us was asked what beer he wanted (choices were MGD, Miller Lite and Coors Light) he shouted "SURPRISE ME", which seriously cracked me up and made my day.  It goes without saying, but the opening of the can and pouring it into a cup is the worst method of cornwater delivery ever devised, but I am guessing that they don't trust Soldier Field fans with those plastic bottles full of beer as they might get tossed.  This is why we can't have nice things.

Obscure Jersey Collection

Here is my "haul" from the obscure jerseys we saw at the Bears Bengals game.  First up, the coveted Dane Sanzenbacher jersey from when he was on the Bears.  Of course, he is now on the Bengals so at least the jersey wearer got one more pseudo legitimate use out of it.
 Ocho Cinco.  Come on, man.
 Moose Muhammad, with the Ocho Cinco right next to him.
 Here was this day's winner, the coveted Cade McNown, with the Brian Piccolo just a few feet away.

Unemployed Linebacker

While perhaps maybe not drunk, this guy cracked me up.  He was posing for a ton of photos.  He didn't have a tip jar or anything so I think he was just doing it for the shits and giggles.  Of which there were many.

Briggs Piss

This was annoying.  This jerk with a Lance Briggs jersey took a leak right by our vehicle more than once.  Due to the slope of the lot, the pile of urine crept toward our tailgating/eating area and prohibited entry into our vehicle unless we wanted to slosh through.  We saw plenty of people do just that as they were moving from place to place.  Nasty.  This is part of that NFL fan friendly experience you read about all the time.

Drunk in Repose

We are particularly fond of our Drunks in Repose series, and this is a fine example sent to us from ace correspondent GFV.  This was around 10am.  You can see LSD to the left.

Monday, July 29, 2013

This Guy...

...is waiting for us in the South Lot.


But in the meantime, the Drunk Bear Fans roadshow goes off this weekend, with Drunk Lollapalooza Fans and Drunk Brewer Fans.

Saturday, July 27, 2013

It Is Almost Time

The players are in camp, and it will be pre season before you know it.  This year will be a good one.

Friday, July 5, 2013

South Lot, Baby

The South Lot was where the original "Drunk Bear Fans" theme came into full view.  Dan and I were always amongst the first to enter the lot at 8am each Sunday, four hours before game time, where a sea of completely drunken fools was brewing.  This is where we met "Drunk'n Idiot" (as it says on the back of his jersey) and "Mayor Daley", the mid 50 or so year old guy who famously ranted on a drunken atomic clock at about 10:30 every morning about "Our House" and pulled his shirt off and poured beer on himself while atop a vehicle.  It is likely exactly these guys that the Bears had in mind when they said you can't just sit out and tailgate during the game - you have to go in to the stadium - because I don't know if they ever left the lot.

After a few years of this we grew tired of the stupidity and we moved on to the Adler Lot, which had its fill of drunks (notably the "Suit Crew") but a much better view and a calmer vibe.  However, our relative solace was disturbed by the idiotic "jukebox" crew that monopolize a few spots and set up a monstrous jukebox playing the crappiest tunes available.

So, when Dan got a parking pass this year for the Adler lot in the Bears' lottery, we briefly considered selling it in order to buy an Adler Lot pass, but then we figured "F' It" and it is back in the South Lot, the birthplace of DBF.

We expect big things from you this year, South Lot!  The Bears have a new coach, a new vibe, and a good chance of success (Bears fans are optimists, even when we have no right to be optimistic based on our sad history in our lifetimes).  Bring out the Drunks!


Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Damn I Hate This Song


At the Bears game tailgate we are continually pestered by the terrible jukebox that the guys near us at the Adler lot set up in a giant tent with huge speakers. Dan and I usually try to bet on which song is going to come next; one time he shouted "Thunderstruck" and damn if that wasn't the first song they played.

Of all the songs we are most tired of, "Stranglehold" has to top the list.  So it was my lucky day at the White Sox opener to hear this...


Recently I was at the "Taste of River North" and they had a hilarious cover band from the Loop titled 97.9 and I had to cover my ears for this one...

Friday, March 1, 2013

Bears T Shirt Seen in Key West

I had a laugh at this Bears' T shirt seen in Key West.

Damn if only the Bears could start beating up on the Pack like we used to in the semi-olden days. Every loss to them is brutal.

Friday, February 1, 2013

Drunk Bear Fans on Location

Dan and I are headed out to Reno for the Super Bowl. This is the second year of our annual tradition, and we usually meet astoundingly drunk football fans of all sorts. Last year since I was wearing a Bears shirt a completely faced' fan came up to me and said how he named his daughter after Walter Payton and went on and on. During the approximately 120 seconds we talked to him he dropped his credit card, personal phone, and work phone on the ground so it is likely that his night ended badly, like a true Drunk Bear Fan.

Due to the wonders of Technology I am blogging this from the actual plane with a photo of the for-the-ride Heineken (I was going to get a Coors Light just for Dan) and Brian's Bloody Mary.

Hey remember when the Bears were 7-1 and we thought that just maybe there'd be a bit of post season action for us? We all know how that ended and are reduced to just watching a game I could give a crap about because the Bears aren't in it. Oh well that is grist for another site now just on to meeting drunks of all sorts watching the Super Bowl.